The Last Supper of the Sluts

I was having lunch this weekend with a friend and we got to talking about another taboo topic- the invisible lines being drawn between young people, in what I like to affectionately think of as The War Between Prudes and Whores.
You know what I am talking about, when you're at lunch with some friends, all in your 20's (or sometimes a completely different age... you know how I loathe ageism!) and suddenly, through the topic of conversation, you realize that one of your lunchmates is a virgin! You're shocked; I would be shocked! They look just like everyone else (unless they're mormon or live in one of those farmland, secluded religious communes).
And suddenly, because of your obvious shock at discovering a 22-year-old virgin (They do exist!) you slowly come to realize that you're at an entire table of 20-something virgins! Alright, the majority of them have all probabley had a dick in their mouths and a finger in their pussy but they're virgins. And now the amazing part, what truly amazes me is the almost instantaeous shift you, as a seasoned slut, go from being a confident, healthy, sexually liberated young man or woman to suddenly realizing that you've become the big fat whore at the table.

"You mean you've never had a dick inside your pussy... ever?"

"B-but I've had like... ohmygod, I've had like 10 dicks in my pussy. Maybe 15! I'm such a whore!"

Most former virgins I've met aren't normally ashamed of the fact that they've gone to town a few times, other than the usual regrets we often have from time to tme- not that we had sex but who we had sex with.
It's amazing the power the Prudes have over us Whores just by the guilt we heave upon ourselves; we start to question ourself, our morality and the choices we've made. 10 minutes ago someone could've stopped us on the street for one of those random consumer report surveys (that I personally feel are used by some unknown government organization) and the first question could've been "Are you a virgin?". A simple "Ha!" followed by a resounding "No, I'm not!" is the norm, and delivered with the utmost confidence in your decision to have come to the darkside and take your rightful place at the Last Supper of the Sluts.

I'm sure this is exactly the same for an unknowing Prude who is lunching with a table full of Whores and suddenly realize that there are probabley more spider-webs in their pussy than there are nerves- but then again it's been so long since I subscribed to Prude Weekly I don't even know what that feels like... it doesn't feel as good as the many benefits and inscentives that a membership to Sluts R' Us does, I can bet on that!

Guilt is a useless emotion- so is shame and regret. We've all made the choices in our lives ourselves, sometimes with the help of a puhsy, horny boyfriend back in the 10th Grade, but albeit ourselves. We've got to take ownership of our life choices and embrace them. You can be a Prude or you can be a Whore... whatever Life Team you've signed up to play for be proud of your team and wave your jersey high in the sky.

Because no matter what table I sit at, at whichever restaurant, and no matter who I may be dining with- (teammates or rivals) one thing is for certain- I play for the Whores and I always will. And ain't no 20-year old Monica-Lewinsky-wanabe-son-of-a-bitch gonna make me feel guilty for playing on my team!